Problems falling asleep in babies and children

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Why is sleep so important?

Sleep is a natural recovery period for the body and mind. He relaxes and creates new energies. During sleep, the brain processes the various impressions and experiences of the day, among other things by producing dreams.

As tired, exhausted and stressed you can be after a night with too little sleep, you are as rested, relaxed and full of energy after a good night's sleep. This applies to both adults and children of all ages. Therefore, parents should make sure that their child sleeps sufficiently and well.

Usually children get as much sleep as they need and when they are tired they sleep. The main problem with parents is that their child sleeps during the day and wakes up at night because they then don't get enough sleep themselves. When and how long a child sleeps varies greatly from person to person and depends on age.

How Much Should a Child Sleep?

During the first three months of life, infants sleep an average of 17 hours a day. They have not yet got used to the day-night rhythm and usually wake up every two to three hours to drink.

At around six to nine months of age, children sleep an average of around 14 hours a day. The nightly sleep periods lengthen. It usually no longer has to be fed at night and can sleep through the night. Many children in this age group also take two naps during the day.

Children aged one year still need an average of 14 hours a day to sleep. By the time you start school at the age of six, it drops to an average of eleven hours a day.

Attention: This information is only to be understood as a guide! The need for sleep, sleep and daily rhythms are highly individual characteristics. If your one-year-old only sleeps about twelve hours out of 24 and is otherwise healthy, fresh and happy, he will certainly not miss the remaining hours.

Before you worry about your child's abnormal sleep rhythm: Compare this with the close relative. It may be that there are similarities here.

My baby wakes up every two hours - what can I do?

A newborn has an increased need for food and wakes up naturally - even at night - to drink every two to three hours. Usually sleep intervals lengthen over time. From around six months of age, night feeding is usually no longer necessary. If your child still craves nightly meals and you want to wean them off, the following rituals can be helpful:

Do not turn on the lights when the baby wakes up.
Do not play with him and talk to him as little as possible.
If the baby is wet, swaddle with as little effort as possible.
If the baby is just thirsty, give him water, not milk.
It is beneficial not to even teach the baby that a bottle is essential to fall asleep.

This may sound a little harsh, but it will help the baby get used to the fact that the night is there to sleep.

My baby cries at night - should I make him cry?

No! A baby that cries needs its parents. Just your presence gives your child a feeling of security. It is often enough to stroke it a little to make it feel secure. A crying child needs to know that he is not alone.

Crying does not mean that the baby needs to eat or be entertained. In any case, make sure that your baby is not crying because he is sick.

How do I get my baby to sleep through the night?

Until the age of six months, it is normal for infants to wake up at night - they need one or more meals during the night. From the sixth month onwards, babies theoretically get by without nighttime feeding and can sleep through the night (i.e. sleep for at least six to eight hours at a time).

If your child isn't already and you want to help them sleep through the night, the first thing you should do is determine whether you are both ready. Also determine when you should start getting used to it and prepare yourself for it - so that you don't give up after the first unsuccessful night:

As parents, discuss with each other how you want to approach the matter.
Go to bed with your baby at the same time to get enough rest yourself.
Make an appointment with your partner in advance when you want the day to start again.

Start with the least expensive resources:

When the baby wakes up, gently stroke him, cover him up well and give him his pacifier. This may help for an hour. Try the same procedure again.
If your child still cannot rest, change the diaper. However, do not turn on the light or entertain it. It may sleep for another hour or so after that.
If this doesn't help either, give your baby a little water to drink. This has two functions: on the one hand, you signal to the baby that there is nothing to eat at night, but that water can be given. On the other hand, it gives you the certainty that your child is not thirsty.
If your child is afraid of the dark, leave a 15 watt emergency light on in their room.
Your child should have one or two favorite small animals or dolls in bed. An additional help can be a T-shirt from the mother, which smells like her and thus facilitates the nocturnal separation.
If your child sleeps a lot during the day, you should lovingly wake them up earlier, as extensive daytime sleep shortens the nighttime sleep.
Get your child used to quiet, recurring sleep rituals such as singing or reading aloud.

Can all children sleep through the night?

A few children only sleep a full night from the age of 1½ years, regardless of what the parents try. However, the majority of babies learn this very quickly.

You may ask your pediatrician or an infant nurse.

My baby just wants to sleep in my bed

It is natural for a child to feel most comfortable in their parents' bed. Here you will find warmth, security and closeness. It depends entirely on you and your partner whether you want to let your baby sleep in bed with you.

However, once your child is used to sleeping in your bed, it can be very difficult to get them used to it. It is therefore extremely important for parents to agree on all the consequences: Do everyone involved find it comfortable and for how much longer? What about the parents' sex life? Is there even enough room for three? What if another child comes?

A compromise could be that you put the cot next to your bed. In this way, the child has at least the parents within reach. The general rule is: only do what both you and your partner feel like doing. What "you" do is not always the best for your family.

Is my baby not sleeping because he is sick?

If you are concerned that your baby is not sleeping or is sleeping poorly, or if you suspect something is wrong, you should have your baby examined by your pediatrician. Babies can have trouble sleeping due to cystitis, earache, colic, colds, coughs, or other illnesses. Of course, you should be sure that your baby is fine before trying to change their sleeping habits.

General advice

Combine putting your child in bed with something cozy. For example, read something to him, give him a massage or give him a bath before going to bed.
Maintain fixed bed times.
NEVER use the bed as a place of punishment.
Always put your child to bed before they are overtired and literally falls over with tiredness. A child should be fresh in and out of bed.
Let your child rest a little in bed. It doesn't have to go to sleep right away.
Weighing can help you sleep.
Dim the lights or turn them off completely when you go to bed.
Lower the general level of activity in the family, that is, turn the TV or the music down and dampen the conversation a little.
If your child is unhappy at night, don't pick them up, just stay with them until they calm down. DO NOT let it cry you to sleep. A crying child needs comfort.
Putting the child in their parents' bed can cause you to wean them off later, but it is a fairly effective way of getting your child to sleep.